Runaway love

Current Mood: Undecided...
Current Music: Pirates of the Carribbean Sountracks, 1&2

Well, I saw Pirates yesterday...YAY!! So fun, it was a day off, so about 12 of us decided to go for Chinese and go see Pirates!! I won't spoil it, but yeah, pretty much loved it, and I will absolutely go see it again with anyone!!! Must get the soundtrack to round out my collection...
Anyways, I had soccer on Tuesday, which ended rather badly, because i played my former team and coach, and the referee was an absolute ass!!! He gave us NO CALLS FOR THE WHOLE GAME!! You can't tell me that the other team didn't do anything wrong THE ENTIRE GAME!!! Fcuk, I hate that ref...He thought obsruction is no longer in the rulebook!! WHAT RULEBOOK IS HE WORKING OUT OF???????
Sorry, little spazzy, but I really didn't like him, and I wasn't the only one... we lost, 1-0 anyways.
Afterwards, while talking to Tim on the phone, he suggests that I should go to the Stetsons rehearsal on Wednesday, because i have Thursday off. (Yes, two days in a row, I know you're all jealous...well, those of you who don't go to Abe...) Uhm, okay, interesting idea...maybe, I say, and my mom as well. In the end, Nils had a soccer game nearby, and my mom dropped me off, then picked me up most of the way through the rehearsal. I have to say though, Timmy, that was the most absurd suggestion ever. Anyone in band knows that inviting someone to a rehearsal means they'll be sitting there, just listening and watching. And considering I had to leave halfway through Mass Band, there really wasn't anything of interest to watch, except the Colour Guard, but still, I sat for nearly two hours without speaking! Plus, I've seen the show. I mean, I liked freaking out all my CSSB friends by randomly showing up, but still. I highly doubt I will be doing that again.
I've now uploaded all of Round-Up's field show from Music n' Motion onto YouTube. My account is CSSBgroupie, I think it'd be easier for you all to find them that way. I'm working on getting Stetsons' up, but it's really long and slow, so I might not have them done today...we'll see...
I really should be doing my Social homework, but I've completely forgotten how to write a business letter in French. Something about, you can't address the person, you have to say like Cher Monsieur ou Madame...I think...Don't know, don't care. I'll do it tomorrow, before school, frantically asking everyone, "How the hell do I do this????" =P
It's funny, in the past two/three weeks, I've changed a lot, and if I can notice it...I know that my relationship with Henry has changed, we're actually on speaking terms, and I think he's getting the fact that I have the same friends as him. Going to the movie with him and everyone else yesterday, and last week when Chelsea had my MnM ticket, and she wasn't there, I realized that he knows, and I need to stop. Just, stop. I think I'm finally over him. I know most people think that's an odd thing to say, but it's true. Ask me if you want the whole story. Anyways, I'm done fighting him, and I'm ready to be his friend again.
It's funny, almost ten times today, tears have come to my eyes. And everytime, they were for boys. Stupid boys =P. I keep wondering, and asking myself, am I really different. And really, I know I am. But, it's hard when each day, I wonder, am I going to call him, or what? I hate to, because I don't want to be the girl who needs attention constantly, but on the other hand, I hate going a whole without communicating with him in any way shape or form. Oh, and there is the fact that I think he keeps a) forgetting his cell phone or 2. forgetting to turn it off Silent after band. But, i can't help but wonder...I met his friends on Sunday, hardly though. And I apparently am such an outsider that I don't the respect of my name. I understand he's had a lot of "girl toys" but at least call me my name, all I want to be known for who I am, not for who I'm associated with.
Final thoughts, I officially have no sympathy for Marching Geeks. I saw your guys' warm-up, running suicides, and jumping jacks, and i watched y'all march, slides, forwards/backwards etc. but still. I have no sympathy when you guys walk out panting. Soccer players run before practice, during practice and after practice. We run before a game, during a game, and usually after a game. You guys march quickly, slowly, moderato (hehe =P). We run. Jogging to start, but then my warm-up goes into a fast skip, which includes various arm movement, and then a shuffle. Sprint to the end line and back, carry the ball, fight for the ball, run afterwards. We run insane suicides after practice. Guard would maybe be the only ones I could relate this exercise regime to, because they move faster and a bit more than others. I know soccer and marching are taxing, physically and mentally, marching maybe more mentally than soccer, but still, we work really hard, and we go for a bit longer than y'all. I've played 90 minutes straight, whereas your longest parade maybe goes for a couple hours, with a few breaks, because someone up ahead was being slow. Anyways, this is just me ranting, you've no need to debate this.

Quotes:

"Four of you have tried to kill me. One of you suceeded."
"My peanut." - Jack Sparrow

(My grandmother walking out the front door, looks down at the step) "Hey, there's three pennies here, they're yours!" - Grandma. I love her so much.

Give me a shoulder to cry on, when I need it.

Current Mood: Exhausted emotionally, tired, depressed, unhappy.

Well, I'm writing this at school, mainly cause this is the only time I'll be able to.
So, on Saturday, my soccer team won our first game. Yay!! We won it 3-0, which is really good, and Brittani (the other goalkeeper) saved a penalty!! That is excellent, because keepers aren't expectedto save penalty shots.
After soccer, I had my end-of-the-year piano recital. All went farily well, except in my first piece, Sonatina by Thomas Attwood. I've been trying to memorize it, and during the recital, I forgot the middle section. However, being trained not to stop, I paused only a moment, and skippeda couple bars in order to keep the piece going.
Yesterday, I went to Music n' Motion, and I have decided that I am going to make this an annual thing, whether I go alone, with friends, whatever. I'll go until I die. And even then I'm going to tell God to let me come down just to watch that. =) I chilled with Grant during intermission, which was cool, and he owes me three bucks. So does Tony, casue I bought them drinks. Chelsea pretty much attacked me during intermission, as did Tony. I did get to sort of meet Braydon and Moni, which was nice...however, it was very short considering Grant was in line for drinks for me. After intermiss, I went and sat behind Stetsons, and pretty much talked with the Tony the whole time. The bands were great though, and I filmed Round-Up and Stetsons, so if you guys want to see the recordings, just let me know! =) Unfortunately, I didn't really get to talk to Tim. =(
I've been really exhausted lately, and it's not fun. I'm trying to hide that fact from my parents, and it's getting harder and harder. Plus, they're more likely to kcik me off the phone now. They should just let me back on the computer, then they wouldn't have that problem.
Kelsey was just dumped. I know no one cares, but, it's been hard for her. C'mon guys, most of you remember when your first relationship fell apart.
Friday was the 30th anniversary of the release of the first Star Wars. My dad remembers what theatre he it at. That theatre is gone now. Anyways, Nils and I celebrated by having a weekend-long Star Wars marathon. We were up till at 12:30 two nights in a row. Fortunately, we finished by about 8pm on Sunday, which meant we could go to bed.
Speaking of sleep, I think my life has gotten so crazy and drama-filled, that it's actually affecting my sleep. I woke up at least once and hour over the weekend, and it's really not good when I'm trying to hide most of my exhaustion from my parents.
Anyways, I think I've ranted and bored you all enough, so I'll leave until the next time I can get onto a computer.

Quotes:

"Out of the three of us, Tim's the one who wants it the most, and he's the one who will get it the least. " - Moni, how true...

"M. Porier thinks that Haley is dating either Keenan or me!" - Kurt

"Ms. Ng apparently thinks that we're dating." - Spencer, considering he can't even spell my name...

Yay, 30th post!!

I'm just so sick
Of the hurt, the lies and the pain
Leave me be
Let well enough alone

We're alone
But together
And I'm tired of
You never getting it

Please, Please
Don't walk away
But I think I need you gone
Stay, leave, wait

Don't let me think I've lost
I'm ready for you
to tell me the truth
Be real, please

Because if you're not
I'll be broken
Not damaged, but broken
Worse than ever been seen

You're not yet my world
And I can't make you be
All I ask is for you to grow up
I need you here

But how can you be here when
I know you don't even want me
You're just playing with me
Messing with who I am

Because I've pretended for you
And dreamed for you
I changed for you
And only you
I love you Tim.
I'll never forget
What this was
But never will I linger
On what is wasn't
I love you Sean.
Run away with me
Because I'm alone
And I'll never know anything else
If we don't have faith
I love you all. Don't think this means anything, cause I'm not sure if it does.

Children's Hospital...again.

today I got a concussion.
Fun, I know. I'll give everyone the whole story soon enough. I'm sorry, I'm still a little brain-dead, but just know that at the worst point, i thought the alphabet ended at V. And, when attempting to text Keenan, I spelt "hospital" 'hiosipal'.
Give me a call guys, it'll really help. I love you Tim
Even worse, Sean's at RYLA. =(

Sorry y'all.

hey guys, expect the posts to be few and far between for the next couple weeks. I'll explain to those that want to know.

Come and keep your comrade warm

Current Mood - Relaxed
Current Music - The Long and Winding Road - The Beatles
Underwater March - Pirates of the Carribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
Right here, Right now - Fatboy Slim
A Hard Day's Night - The Beatles
Get Back - The Beatles LOVE
Opening Theme - Yutaka Minobe & Takayuki Maeda
What's Your Name? - Lynyrd Skynyrd
Get Down(You're the one for me) - Backstreet Boys

Well, Sunday was actually a very nice day. I reffed a game at 12pm, then pretty much came home and helped make dinner,cause my entire immeadiate family and Mat and Tara's girlfriend and boyfriend respectively, were coming for dinner. We played a lot of family Wii, which was really nice. And everyone taunted me for talking to Tim, even though M&T's gf/bfs were there... :/
Today was a nice school day, Science was a very relaxed class. I was allowed to leave early, because my FLA class went to La Rouge restaurant for lunch. Wow, was that some amazing food. There was a great mushroom and garlic soup to start, followed by a choice of either salmon or chicken ravioli. I had salmon, and Hannah had chicken, so we shared. They were both very good, although I think I prefered the chicken. Dessert was a brownie was butterscotch sauce and rasberries, ice cream, a gooseberry and half a strawberry. It was sooooo good. Unfortunately, Meagan got a little hyper from the Sprite and dessert. It was rather funny. Leslie, Hannah and I all entered the band room at the same time, and that was the exact moment that Paddock was giving a huge lecture. Apparently, Sam had his headphones in, and was listening to them during the pieces, and at a pause, everyone could hear them.
Social was funny, we watched a video with some frighteningly funny pictures, music and cartoons. Plus, when she turned out the lights, Henry's sunburns started glowing.
Soccer practice was actually really relaxing, even though I was unhppy with my dad for the way he was making me work, but really, it was a good practice.

Quotes:
"You can't disturb someone who's already disturbed." - Ms. Ng, my science teacher

"The middle being a vampire, I mean elevator." - Spencer

"Thorncliffe, or-" (Spencer)
"-Genius?" (Haley and Spencer)
I love you Tim.
Cheers y'all.

The IV and, your hospital bed...

Current Mood - Happy, puzzled, slightly and awkwardly injured.
Current Music - Camisado - Panic! At The Disco

So, yesterday was quite a nice day. We started Bio in Science, and I don't terribly mind it, however, I'm perfectly content with just taking Sci 20/30 in the next two years.
Kelsey went to a movie with her friends and Guddu, and Nils decided he wanted to go to a movie too. So, that meant I had to find someone to go to a movie in about 30 mins. Luckily, Alec, our nieghbor was able to go, but unfortunately, we arrived too late to get tickets to Wild Hogs, and got tickets to the Invisble instead. One thing I didn't realize was, that was the movie Kelsey was going to see. I would not have suggested it had I known. Anyways, the movie was great, but I'm not allowed to talk about it, thanks to Sean.
When I got home last night, I checked my email, and found out that my ref gig at 9:00am tomorrow was cancelled. That was nice, so it meant that i didn't have to be reffing soccer at 9am on a Saturday. However, my mother wanted me to check at *:50 this morning, just ot be sure that my game was cancelled. I checked again, and insisted it was. Stupid smart referees, one's injured and sent me his assignment for 10am. Fun, fun. All went well, other than the fact that the field was soaked/muddy.
After that, I somehow managed to take a 2-hour nap, and managed to get most of my nesscessary tasks done. I went to Sean's house at 7, which, undoubtly, was a good time. We watched Boston Legal, which is like, the best law show on television, EVER!! I love you Alan Shore... but not as much as I love Tim. Our passion creshendo'd more then Bolero..<3

Quotes:
"Hate all fake blondes unless they do something useful." - Me
"Caligraphy, like wierd pictures and shit-like what the Egyptians did!" - Chad, one of Sean's *ahem* less gifted classmates.
Wow, I honestly had so many, but I've forgotten them now.

Love is officially blinding.

Current Mood - ECSTATIC!
Current Music - There's a reason these tables have numbers honey, you just haven't thought of it yet - Panic! at the Disco

So today, Amanda, Cheylina, Katelyn and I all brought our Gameboys to school, and all our Pokemon games, cause we saw a guy on the bus yesterday with a Gameboy colour. I brought my Colour and Pocket, Manda brought her Colour Pikachu Edition(!), Chey brought her SP and Dolg(gold-I spelt that backwards completely by accident, I didn't want to delete it)Pokemon game, and Katie brought her SP and i think Red. I brought my Yellow, and Manda brought her Yellow and Silver.
Gym class was okay, considering we had to run to Foothills pool to the tennis courts. Then, after about twenty minutes, we had to leave cause it started raining. Then we played dodgeball for about an hour.
Social was...interesting to say the least. First, we had a unit test, with a sub. When we finished (by we I mean Rylann, Koos and I) after 20 minutes, we asked to go to the library. However the library was full( NO space anywhere, not a computer or table) so we went to the cafeteria. We finished everything we could on our project, and then just pretty much took a spare. I played Gameboy, and Ry watched me, Koos left to get some food, and Henry joined us part way through. That was the best peroid I've ever had.
So lunch was pretty wicked too, mostly Kurt, Keenan, Allen and I chilled in the debate room.
Nothing terribly exciting in FLA, but in Science, when I was finished my test, my mother called me. On my cell phone. So, I went to Ms. Ng, and asked if I could use her phone. She asked me why, and I told her that my mother just called me. She rolled her eyes and consented.
So after school, it was snowing like heck. Fortunately, Kelsie offered me a ride home, so I didn't have to walk through it. When I got home, I was pretty happy when Kelsey told me to call Tim. Phone conversations are my favourite kind, except for face-to-face.
Tonight, about an hour before my soccer reffing gig started, I checked my email, and discovered the game was cancelled. YAY!!! I'm pretty happy about that.
I realized today during gym that I used to date one of THE least-athletic people in my school. No hand-eye coordination to speak of. Not that I'm trying to be mean, but it's true. Sorry G-Unit.
During FLA today, I scratched my chin, and it began bleeding like there was no tomorrow. I managed to stop the bleeding fortunately. Then, tonight, I scratched my chest, and began bleeding like there was no tomorrow. So, I've decided that my body thinks there is too much blood in my system, and needed to get it out.
Missing Tim and Sean like there's no tomorrow y'all.
Quotes:
"It's raining men! Halljuia!" - Haley and Rylann

"It's raining man juice?" - Catherine Willows

"You know Venus was the Goddess of..." (Rylann)
"Love? Yeah" (Haley)
"And..." (Rylann)
*giggles* - Haley and Rylann

"I'm your Venus, I'm your fire!" - Rylann

"Nothing broke, nothing spilled, there was just some glass on glass action" - Haley
Wow, I didn't realize how dirty that sounded.

"That's a really pretty necklace." - Tim
I know, it's a little old, and really, it's the way he said it that makes it a quote. It just came into my mind suddenly today.
<3 Timmy...

Soccer, I love you.

I had a great after-practice session by myself today. I worked so hard, on the things i need. And yay for doing extra training after practice. Especially in front of the U18 boys. Cause i was playing their caliber. And I'm all 'haha, it'd be funny...if one of them hit on me...'cause they'd never succeed.'
ah, this was a great night.

Leave us alone, Mel Brooks!

Current Mood - Excited
Current Music - Dark House - Spirit of the West
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band(Reprise) - The Beatles LOVE
Sideways to the Sun - Horselips
He Wasn't - Avril Lavgine
Blinded By the Light - Manfred Mann

So the past couple days have calmed down a bit. Yesterday, I could've, but really didn't fee like blogging, and consequently, I was talking for about 45 mins with Tim on the phone. Ahh, I love long conversations, with anyone really.
Soo, today was Career Fair, which I went to instead of going to my APTA Festival, which is kind of an optional exam prep. I'm kinda glad I went to career fair, bcause I found out the I would really love to not be a Music Therapist, they are possibly the most boring people in the world. At the job fair, I think I'd like to work at Blacks Photography. That would be a great job next year. Spencer and I applied for jobs at Garage, however, we have no intention of working there, for me, at least not until next year. I don't need a job now, I'll need one next year, when my parents make me pay for my ridiculous text bills. (TIM! =P ) But, we got free mirrors, and I need one, for when my contacts fuzz up.
So, in band, we're no longer going to play With Each Sunset(Comes the Promise of a New Day), but instead we will be playing one of our festival pieces, Royal Canadian Sketches, a former Red Deer Royals piece. Which means that we (the horns) get wicked parts, like some nice melody, and counter-melody. But, unfortunately, that is not the case for everyone. I was talking about it to Leslie, and she told me that problem with marching band music for clarinets, they get just random trills, and scales. Poor clarinets, yay for horns!! The only reason we're switching is because Aidan got into National Concert Band!!! YAY AIDS!! But, he'll miss our final concert. =( However, I'm uber happy for him.
So, lately, since finding my writing journal, I'v ebeen writing poems quite a bit more. I've fogotten all the things that used to bother me, and I've remembered how hard it was for me to be in grade nine last year. I know, it's shocking to think of it, but I really was emo, to the point that my life was just depressing and down. If I had hoodies, I'd've worn them. There's also a story that I wrote, that included Tim, long before I really knew him. Funny to read things now...I've totally lost inspiration for it, so it's less than half done, and it's 15 pages. =P
I feel like I'm missing something. I had so much to say earlier, but suddenly, it's left my mind. If I remember, I'll let y'all know.
I miss Tim like there's no tomorrow. =(
Quotes:
"But I play there!" (Chelsea)
"He said trumpets." (Haley)
"But I play there!!" (Chelsea)
"He said trumpets only!" (Anders)

"Do you want to keep stroking it?" - Koos

I keep forgetting quotes...